Take, take me home...

From my hotel room I can see the lights of the city, the ships on the bay and hear the wind and rain blow through the air, hitting the pavement, trees, buildings and anything that stands in the way. A few invitations to meet up with friends I haven't seen in a while and I turn them down to sit here and breathe with no pressure to be smiling and happy, drinking, engaging in enlightening conversation, discussing jobs and chatting about the uncertainty of our futures.

It wasn't intentional, but I just knew I didn't have it in me tonight, even in San Fran. As a society we're always go go go and sometimes it's hard to be okay with just sitting. With allowing yourself a free pass for the night, from the invitation. It's hard, but when you finally do it, you know it's right.

As much as I like traveling, five airports, three cities, three hotels, a conference, a wet football game, unhealthy food and public transportation for five days straight can make a girl lonesome for a place called home. A place she's not always sure she wants to call home, but continues to do so. A place where she hoped to find a man, but realizes she's not going to. A place people say she's lucky to live, but she's still not sure she believes it. Sooner or later, that place she calls home will be some other place with new possibilities and new comforts and the need to take a free pass will still exist. So, if you need one, don't hesitate. This is your opportunity to just say no.

Comments

heatherdc said…
sometimes a night in with yourself, relaxing, does much more for you than anything else. aaand wow, 5 airports?? that's exhausting.

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