Man hiatus

I'm going on one. For the past five months or so since I joined eH and decided I really didn't want to be single forever and that maybe, just maybe, doing something about it would be a positive thing, I put myself out there. I put on a smile, I was open to new opportunities and I even went on a few dates and had long conversations with someone who lives 1,000 miles away.

But the last few weeks have left me bitter and jaded. I'm back to the woman on a mission mindset and don't have the time or energy to "put myself out there" right now. It's back to having me time, reading good books, working out like a warrior, etc.

The thing is, over the past several months, the guys I liked either wimped out or didn't like me back like they claimed to, and the guys who liked me, I didn't return the feelings for.

After watching DeAnna and Jesse on the Bachelorette Monday evening, (mom asked if I was going to watch it, so what the hey, I did) my feelings as of recent were even more solidified. DeAnna picked Jesse (young, wild, prosnowboarder) over Jason (settled, attractive, single dad and the obvious choice). And I could totally identify. I realized, that the guys who liked me were like Jason (minus the whole single dad and settled thing). They were stable and nice, but maybe too nice. I was bored. And the guys I liked were a bit more like Jesse (w/out the guts to say what they were really feeling) and I was attracted to it. I'm attracted to the guys I can't have and probably shouldn't have, but that's precisely why I want them. Ugh.

Comments

Chardsy said…
I know exactly what you are talking about. You get to a point to where you're just so sick of it all.

Good luck with the hiatus!
P.O.M. said…
Hiatus is good! Just ahve fun and focus on yourself and friends. That's what I tried to do, then all of a sudden I have a guy who wants a committment. What the heck?
rhelal said…
Want told you very attractive and had emotion since
Good luck and my washing life in your world

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