Monday, July 10, 2017

Conversations Will Never Be the Same Again

It's been a while, eh?

I have a few posts drafted that I just need to add photos to, but the uploading and editing just seems to take too long. Anyway, I want to write more. My mind seems cluttered these days and the best way I know to dust off the cobwebs is to write.

In busy stages of life, I know we all feel a little frazzled, but I've noticed that after having a baby and how a toddler, it seems like a constant. During the first 6-9 months of Henry's life, I couldn't think of specific words during conversations because I was simply too consumed with caring for a small baby and I was running on fumes/a handful of broken hours of sleep.

But now, I think the chaos brain is thanks to having this other human's life as priority: his schedule, his food needs, his sleep. And then add that to taking care of yourself, managing a household (meals, groceries, bills, cleaning, etc.), paying attention to your spouse, trying to fit in work, exercising, and finally thinking about your friends, family and community. Oh yeah, and then balance. Find some. (Good luck to us all.)

No one tells you that having a conversation likely won't ever be the same again. My train of thought or questioning often ends sooner than it would have previously. I don't always have the mental space to think of that next question I want to know the answer to. And sometimes, the thoughts simply get interrupted by needing to parent my kid (ask him to stop throwing sand or to share a toy).

Anyway, that's what's on my mind right now. My brain feels fuzzy. Like it literally feels likely head is in a cloud. Seven hours of sleep doesn't seem enough. I know it's a luxury compared to those newborn days, but still, I could use more.

You know what else I've been thinking about? How crazy it is that being home with a small human for a day is like doing all the micro tasks you might do at a workplace to achieve your overall goal, but not actually crossing that big thing off the list. Like finishing the project proposal, submitting a story, or sending a brochure to print.

You might pick up 3,492 toys/cups/articles of clothing in a day, make meals, go grocery shopping, take your kid to a park, and STILL have a house that looks like a disaster and a kid who is melting down at 6:00 p.m. Anyway, sometimes I finish the day not sure what I really accomplished besides feeding and taking care of my kid.

But then, he says the darndest thing, cracks up in a hilarious giggle, or gives you the cutest hug and you're like "Okay, kid, you win. I get it. All 3,492 toys/cups/articles of clothing were worth it." 

Anyway, that's all for now. I hope you're having a great week!

Tell me something that's dawned on you recently. Favorite podcast currently? I have several, but a new fav is Myleik Teele's Podcast. She's an entrepreneur and just has a lot of good general life/career advice. And Happier in Hollywood, a spinoff of Happier by Gretchen Rubin, focused on  work and life happiness. 

3 comments:

Lisa from Lisa's Yarns said...

I can totally see how having a child changes your conversations for quite a long time. I have definitely noticed that over the years when getting together with friends with kids. They are just pulled in several directions at the same time so can't really focus on what we are talking about - which is completely fine! It has been a little bit harder for Phil to get to know my group of friends because we rarely get together without kids present and since the parents are distracted, the conversations are just different. And since Phil is so quiet, he isn't really driving the conversation, so I sometimes feel like my college friends don't really know Phil. Which, again, is ok! It's just part of being in different life stages and someday they'll be the ones with kids who are more self sufficient and I'll be the one dealing with a baby/toddler and unable to carry a conversation. But I'll be lucky because they'll know how to support me better than I knew how to support them when Phil and I start a family!

I think the only thing that has dawned on me lately is the recurring theme that I need to work on not over-scheduling. July is kind of over scheduled so I am trying to protect our time in August. Summer is so short here so i want us to be able to do what we feel like doing on the weekends v things we committed to ahead of time.

Amber said...

I can totally see that! Especially when you are trying to have an adult conversation AND care for Henry at the same time! I definitely notice my friends with kids are more focused when they aren't trying to parent AND visit.

I've missed your blog posts so hopefully this is the start of more regular posts for you :) No pressure of course!!

correen e. said...

I've never commented before, but I've enjoyed your blog for some time :) My son is close to Henry's age and your post totally sums up this stage of life!