Do you ever feel like...

you're just not smart/equipped/knowledgeable enough to do the job?

I joined my University's club lacrosse team as a freshman with no experience WHATSOEVER. The girls at the recruiting table were really nice and assured me that "you don't need to know how to play" to be on the team. Plus, they were super smiley and much nicer than the crew team girls who told me I'd have to wake up at 4 A.M. AND cut weight since I'd need to be in the light boat. That made the decision pretty easy.

I couldn't stand the idea of going through college and not being on a team. From four years of volleyball, to two years of running long distance track, to two years of racing on the ski team and a few years of playing spring soccer, high school was a busy time for me. Bottom line: college wouldn't be complete without being on a team, any team. Joining the lacrosse team was the best damn decision I made in my college career, hands down.

From freshman year to senior year of college I went from never having played and royally sucking to helping my team defeat the competition and heading to national championships. I became a team coordinator (team mom, organizer, fundraiser, accountant, coach, etc) and met some great friends, got to travel all over the Northwest in 12 passenger vans and laughed A LOT along the way. I was rarely ever home and sometimes I think my roommates resented me for that. My team was my sole focus.

By senior year, lacrosse had grown so much in the NW that most of the girls on the team had been playing since middle and high school and knew the game better than I ever will. As I transitioned into "the real world" I took on the head coach position for a high school team nearby that was struggling. I did that for the past few years and finally said enough was enough. I couldn't give and give and get little in return and see the girls continue to not want to sprint (even though they were out of shape) or show up to practice, or keep their grades up so they would be eligible for the games.

And guess what? A few weeks ago, some of my old teammates (who were froshies my senior yr) asked me to come help coach them. Their old coach (and my old teammate) just moved down to Cali to be with her fiance who was recruited there for a men's lax coaching job. I now go to their practices and think "What the hell am I doing here? I don't even know what to say or how to articulate what's going through my head. I must seem like such an ass."

Ultimately, I think what they need is leadership and right now, I'm their girl. But still, part of me just can't get over the fact that I simply feel unequipped to coach the #1 team in the league. Yes, I know and love the game. But no, I cannot shoot a goal over my back or pass every ball perfectly or even create a drill from scratch to solve a problem they're having.

Does this happen to you? Do you ever feel like you're doing something you just aren't qualified for?

Comments

Kayla said…
Yeah, I'm running into that a lot. I advise the student yearbook here but I really don't know much about it, and then another club has hinted that it would be nice if I advise them, too. You're totally right, they just want someone who can be a leader, but I just never feel like I can tell other people what to do unless I know how to do it, too. On the other hand, think of how many bosses/managers/CEOs lead people every day with no clue what goes into their jobs... maybe it's not so different?
I love my job, but I sometimes think that I'm not qualified for the position. I got this job right out of college, and it isn't an entry-level position. Things go over my head, and I have no clue what's going on sometimes. I understand exactly what you are feeling...I feel like sometimes someone else is better suited for this position.
heatherdc said…
Ummm yes. I will have that feeling pretty much every day next year when I have to work in a hospital and, all of a sudden, know & remember Everything. Ehhhh :/
I think it's awesome that you take your time to coach, and I'm sure you're making much more of an impression than you realize. We used to have a high school senior help coach us in soccer and we thought she was the coolest person Ever :)

Popular Posts