Dating woes

To me, dating is like a foreign language. It's something I desperately want to learn, but feel I don't have the necessary tools to succeed.

Some people do it with such ease, dating almost with reckless abandon for which I am in awe of. It is something I feel truly unable to do but feel mesmerized by some peoples' ability to open themselves to new situations, unfamiliar faces, and ultimately to the possibility of being vulernable. I vicariously live through the dating woes of Mike Cherico and other bloggers and friends to make up for the gutts I can't seem to find. In some brief moments I find these people inspiring, thinking "I could just try that for a month..." But who am I kidding? Chatting up the cute grocery checker or smiling at the hottie in the gym is just about my limit. So for now, I'll keep pondering the idea of stepping out of my comfort zone.

And flirting? Don't think so. I don't even know what one would do to flirt. I'm lame. So sue me. I have this hope that when the universe is ready to bring me a relationship, it will happen...naturally. I shouldn't have to chat up the guy across the bar while flipping my hair and thinking of something witty to say. It should just happen. And beyond being guttless and unable to flirt, I have the slight problem of being pretty darn picky. I have high standards that I'm not willing to compromise and therefore am unable to "settle for anything less than everything," as the song goes.

And sometimes I wonder, "Am I simply destined to be alone?" Perhaps the universe and I just don't get along on all subjects.

So, my question is: Where do you begin when you feel totally lost?

Comments

I think the main thing (which is something I don't think I've ever done) is to make sure that YOU choose someone. Don't just go for whoever is willing to date you, because if you do that, you'll make that person happy, but you probably won't make you happy, which is a lot of the point of a relationship, I think. When you do find a guy who you want to know more about, you'll know it. And that's when it's most important for you to take the initiative and say to yourself, "I like this guy. And I am an AMAZING girl, and I deserve someone like him. So I'm going to get to know more about him, and ask him out for lunch." Or whatever. You'll find a great guy Lauren, I know it. Someone who deserves someone as great as you! And it's good to have standards - dating just to date is NOT fun, and you'll only end up building guys up just to let them down because you know you don't see a future. Maybe you'll meet the man of your dreams in Moab and have to move to Utah :) Hey, a girl can dream! LOVE YA!!!!
Lauren said…
Sometimes I just wish I could not take things so seriously and just date to be dating. Like the all the carefree youngsters out there. I'm working on it...

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